Maybelline- Iced Mauve

"Sir, we're on beige alert."
---aide to the Neutral Planet's President, on Futurama




This ain't mauve. It might be iced, but it AIN'T mauve. It's beige. I don't know why I bought this. I must have had a total brain fart. Oh, wait, I know why I got it, I wanted something similarly-toned to layer Wet n Wild "Blitzen" over. Blitzen can hold its own over just about anything, so it's less imperative to have this for undies now.

This is thick, chalky, and difficult to apply. It took too long to dry, despite the 50-second claim. Not only that, but it makes a weird dried-film on top, like you'd expect a fast-dry to be, but underneath took forever to set, so it gave me icky lines towards my distal edge.

So...

Report card:

Color= D- (maybe nice for mani hands, but kind of a weird, sallow beige, unflattering I think, the shimmer is ok though)
Formula= D- (very close to unusable, in my opinion)
Brush= C+ (fairly wonky, but not the worst by any means)
Price= B- (I paid 3.22 for mine I think, about average, but a waste considering my disappointment)

Overall= D+

PS, here it is over Blitzen.

Essie- Demure Vixen

Among the taller wood with ivy hung,
The old fox plays and dances round her young.
---"The Vixen" by John Clare








Shown is about three days of wear, so w00t! I had a big lust for this color after seeing it on another blog, and I found it by happenstance on clearance at Ulta last month. I wasn't quite like I thought, it was much sheerer, but I have now come to understand why everyone says that about Essie. It's true! They are so sheer usually! This is about 4 coats I think, maybe even 5 on my thumb and middle finger.

I don't care though, it was gorgeous, and lasted forever, so when my mini one runs out, I will be buying another. It's just such a lovely, unique color and I can see it working for multiple occasions/scenarios.

Report card:

Color= A (love it, so perdy, but would get top marks if it was more saturated)
Formula= A (ditto, only prob is it's too sheer)
Brush= B (well, it's a mini, but even so, it's not a bad brush)
Price= D- (they seem to be 7ish bucks regular price, and that's expensive if you end up not liking it)

Overall= B-

Zoya- Penelope

In the pathway of the sun,
In the footsteps of the breeze,
Where the world and sky are one,
He shall ride the silver seas,
He shall cut the glittering wave.
I shall sit at home, and rock;
Rise, to heed a neighbor's knock;
Brew my tea, and snip my thread;
Bleach the linen for my bed.
They will call him brave.
-"Penelope" by Dorothy Parker




LOVE this! It's a creamy brownish pink. It is officially one of my favorite colors. It's so neutral, yet different from the average red, pink, or beige. It's just chic, minimalist, classiness.

It applied easily, dried at a decent pace, and lasted for a while. I think I wore it 5 days or so and it had nary a scuff and I only changed it because I get bored easily.

So, if you need a nice, yet different business-appropriate color, this is a winner!

Report card:

Color= A+ (it's neutral yet I swear it pops on your nails!)
Formula= A (it was just a little thick, but still so wonderful)
Brush= A (a little thin for the thickness of the polish, still excellent though)
Price= D- (it's $7 a bottle, which is expensive, but for me, this was a great investment!)

Overall= B

Color Club- Best-Dressed List

Any man may be in good spirits and good temper when he's well dressed. There ain't much credit in that.
---Charles Dickens




This might look a little beat-up. I had worn it for 4 days after the holidays, so I was packing up lots of stuff like the Christmas tree, decorations, wrapping stuff, etc. I loved it, and I think it looked great and lasted well. It's a taupey mushroomy earthy tan. Very pretty and flattering to my skin tone. Not sure if it would be flattering for everyone though.

On my ring finger is a comparison of L.A. Colors "Antique Rose." Obviously, it's much redder and much darker, and has the golden shimmer where BDL does not. I like both.

Report card:

Color= A- (pretty lovely, if a bit neutral)
Formula= A (just about the best around)
Brush= B (mine is just average)
Price= B- (I got mine in a multi-pack at Ross for 8 dollars, but they run 3-4 dollars singly online)

Overall= B+

L.A. Colors- Antique Rose

A single rose can be my garden... a single friend, my world.
---Leo Buscaglia




This is L.A. Colors "Antique Rose" with Color Club "Best-Dressed List" on the ring finger as a comparison. It is a dark clayish color with an interesting golden shimmer. I actually really like it, maybe the most of all my clay-toned polishes. It has a lovely depth hanks to the shimmer. It dried quickly and lasted well, and held up just as well, if not better, than the Color Club did. It hard barely any tipwear at all after 3 days, and the CC had slightly more. And get this- it could easily be a 1 coater if you apply it well!

All that for a dollar! I won't complain!

Report card:

Color= A (very nice, to me. It's one I plan to rewear often)
Formula= A (pretty nifty, it might be slightly thick, but overall, still great)
Brush= C+ (the brush is too thin to me, it would be better if it was a bit sturdier and wider)
Price= A+ (just a dollar, so that's the best you can ask for)

Overall= A-

Essie- Nude Beach

"Now that nude-beach season is in full, um, swing, taking things off is once again a public matter. It comes with the additional difficulty of hot sand under one's feet and the unavoidable, inescapable truth that gravity always wins."
---Elizabeth Rosner




Yeah, my nails are stained. It's a shame because this is lovely on its own in my opinion. This is similar to a polish I used to have, Sahlly Hansen used to make it. It was from the Star Opal line but I can't remember the name. Oscar broke my bottle and I forgot to find the name. So, I scoured the internet and bought what most looked like it, which was Pure White Opal. But it's not pure white at all, it's a beigey milky color. Maybe it's old and has yellowed. Eithey way, it looks gross. But this polish looks virtually identical to my original polish, so I think I am not going to worry about it any more.

I love it for "lazi manis" where I just swipe on a single coat for some subtle shimmer and then go on about my day.

Report card:

Color= B- (not the most original, but I like it, and it's nice for layering)
Formula= A- (it's good, dries nice and stuff, not too gritty, etc etc)
Brush= B (average)
Price= D (seems like it runs 5 to 8 bucks, depending on where you find it)

Overall= C+

Color Club- High Society

"Mike: [on telephone] This is the voice of doom.
Mrs. Lord: What?
Mike: This is to tell you your days are numbered.
[hangs up]
Mrs. Lord: Oh dear. One of the servants has been at the sherry again. "
---High Society, film (1956)




Ignore the fuzz! lol




In a word- LOVELY! I love this color and i was very flattering on me. And Color Club's quality was amazing, especially considering I found a set of 6 or 7 polishes at Ross's for just 8 bucks!!! I was shocked! This is definitely excellent quality polish here, so that was a great price!

It's a creme clayish taupeish greyish dreary-dayish cafe-au-laitish kinda color and I love it. Definitely classy! It also lasted forever and with a nice shiny finish and dried in a reasonable amount of time. It's a keeper!

Report card:

Color= A- (I've seen it with other brands, but it's done right)
Formula= A+ (excellent!)
Brush= B+ (a smidge thin but still fine)
Price= B- (not considering the awesome price at Ross, which ended up about a buck a bottle, it can be found for between 3 and 4 dollars online at various locations)

Overall= B+

Borghese- Angelica Blush

Baby
You're my angel
Come and save me tonight
You're my angel
Come and make it all right
---Aerosmith "Angel"



This is a polish I picked up on clearance for 2.19 at Walgreens right after Christmas. My L.A. Colors Classic Pink for french manis turned out bupkis. It was streaky and sheer, so I slated it for frankening (it now has a new life as a yummy golden-pink champagne color, which I've dubbed Aurora and I'll feature soon, or dreckly as my granny says.)

So, I picked up this color, hoping it would fill that now-empty spot. It is a mixed review. On one hand, it was thickish and somewhat streaky- at first application. Luckily, it smoothed out and took on an even glossy, milky-pink tone at 2 applications. My advice is to do the first application thin, then a moderate coat for the second application, to have even coverage and a nice, cushy finish once dry.

Ultimately, this will suit my purposes well and I am no longer in search of a sheer pink for french manis.

Report card:

Color= C+ (this is 'bout as generic as it gets, but hey, classics are classics for a reason I guess)
Formula= B- (suitably average, but would be nice if it were quite so thick)
Brush= A+ (love Borghese brushes)
Price= F (these run $8+ a Wags. If you want to spend that, buy OPI or something else)

Overall= C+

Savvy (Femme Couture) - Hazelnut

Under the hazelnut moon
I know the end is coming soon...
---song lyrics, "Hazelnut Moon" by Joel Willoughby




This is a nice polish. I think it isn't really "hazelnut" but more copper or bronze. It's a very pretty color and I think flattering for most people. But, honestly, it was expensive, especially since I have LA Colors' Topaz, which I feel is comparable enough in color, and maybe even superior in formula, and definitely WAY superior in price. Not to say this one is bad or anything, it's just that I like the Topaz better, and they are so similar, I feel they are kinda superfluous. Oh well.

Report card:

Color= B- (average I guess, and loses points since there are cheaper alternatives)
Formula= B+ (basically average, maybe a smidge better)
Brush= B (average)
Price= C ($4.29 at Sally Beauty- not too bad, but I think for their limited color selection, and small bottles, there are better investments)

Overall= B-

China Glaze- Chiaroscuro

"We're each of us our own chiaroscuro, our own bit of illusion trying to emerge into something solid, something real. We've got to forgive ourselves that. I must remember to forgive myself. Because there's an awful lot of gray to work with. No one can live in the light all the time."
---Libba Bray (A Great and Terrible Beauty)




I love this color in the bottle. It's a nudish pink with delicate green and golden shimmer. The formula applies easily and smoothly and dries fairly fast. However, it was so sheer, and it took on a ruddier cast once it was on my nails, making my hands look puffy and my fingers look stubby. But it was hardy and the glossy finish was nice.

I don't think you should buy this color unless this is the kind of look you know you'll like. I tend to like colors like this, but this just doesn't work for me.

Report Card:
Color= C (interesting in theory, fails in execution)
Formula= C (great with application and hardiness, but too opaque)
Brush= A (fairly good brush)
Cost= D+ (5.99 I think? I wish I had my money back on this purchase for sure)

Overall= C+

Orly- Prince Charming

"Prince charming can you rescue me
Are you real can you make me feel
Feel unreal"
---Willa Ford "Prince Charming"




This color is a lovely, milky cocoa color. It has no shimmer, it is straight-up creamy, chocolatey goodness. The formula took some getting used to, it was thick, but not in a bad way. It was very forgiving and smoothed out quickly with application. I could probably get away with just a single coat, which is great for days when I'm on the run. I prefer it for fall and winter, but I also think it's neutral enough to work year-round. It lasted perfectly for 2 days and showed no sign of stopping, but I was bored and itching for something new.

The brush was adequate, but something that really made application much easier was the rubberized handle.

I bought it at Sally Beauty and it was a spicy meatball for me- $5.99. I will only pay that for unique colors in the future, even with the nice formula. I get so bored so quickly, that I don't have to have the long-lasting quality, I'm all about the color my friend, and I'm pretty sure I've seen similar colors with cheaper brands.

Report Card-
Color= B+ (not entirely unique, but is a flattering color I think for most people)
Formula=A (just about the best I've personally used, but a smidge thick and not very fast-drying)
Brush= A- (Average quality brush, but the handle earned extra credit)
Price= D+ (almost regret buying it at 5.99, I'm budget-challenged)

Overall= B

L.A. Colors- French Cream

French Cream:

* 1 (8-ounce) package cream cheese
* 1 cup powdered sugar
* 1 cup whipping cream
* 1/4 cup granulated sugar
* 1 lemon, zested and juiced
* Pineapple juice

Directions

Soften cream cheese and then whip with powdered sugar. Whip cream and sugar together until it forms soft peaks. Combine beaten cream cheese, whipped cream, lemon juice and zest; continue to beat, adding just enough pineapple juice to achieve desired consistency. Serve with fresh fruit tray or fruit salad.
---Paula Deen, Food Network




French SCREAM is more like it, because that's what it made me want to do when I put it on there, and not in a "OMG, it's the Beatles!" kinda way but a go-ahead-and-commit-me-I-am-losing-my-mind kinda way. Super thick, streaky, globby mess. Dried fast though, but sometimes you can have too much of a good thing. This was one of those moments. It dried nearly as fast as I drew it from the bottle, and eventually the brush, which was already sub-par to begin with, started to glob up. I couldn't get the streaks out either. The pic is with 2 coats, and the more I added, the worse it got.

At least I only paid a $1 for it. But hey, I coulda bought tons of better things for that buck.

Report card
Color= D- (next to falling, it's sorta pukey looking, but it's sheer enough and serves the purpose for a sheer, traditional mani)
Formula= F (streaks, globs, and fugliness)
Brush= C+ (obviously less than average, but was doable)
Price= B (I can't in good conscience put an A, even though it was a buck, since it was such a horrible buy, I'd rather have my dollar back)

Overall= D+

Sally Hansen- Rose to the Occasion

"When you came along, with a strange new song
and the sweetest innovation
And you said "One should never fall in love,
but rise to the occasion..."
---Nanci Griffith "Rise to the Occasion"

---




Wow, my pic does NOT do this justice. It is such a gorgeous pink with a delicate, barely-there shimmer. It is so fun and retro-looking. It immediately makes me think of Barbie's high heels, My Little Ponies, and my coveted LA Gears. I love it.

The polish is decent, although it definitely needed at least 2 coats and then another coat of a good topcoat, since it was fairly gritty looking without it. It also only lasted about a day. I probably could have done a better job with the application and maybe a better job with the topcoat, so it might have lasted better, but I'm not thinking it would have been much more than another day. Sad, because I really love the color. Even with the shoddy formula, I'll be whipping this out again in the future, for whenever I feel like being totally rad.

On to the report card!
Color: A (LOVE IT, absolutely FUN. Not for everyday and every skintone, but I personally dig it)
Formula: C (worse than average, but it was not so awful that I won't wear it again)
Brush: C+ (sorta thin, sorta flimsy, but got the job done)
Price: A+ (found it at Dollar Tree in a two-pack for a buck. So 50 cents? I'm there!)

Overall: B

OPI- Chicago Champagne Toast

"A cause may be inconvenient, but it's magnificent. It's like champagne or high heels, and one must be prepared to suffer for it."
---Arnold Bennett

---


This is a polish I've had forever. I may need to chunk it. It was amazingly thick and globby. I don't recall it being that bad when I applied it in the past, so maybe it's just bad. I love the color though, a rosy frosty delight. I'm unhappy with the formula, but again, it may just be because it's an old bottle. It was thick and unwieldy, and only because of the nice brush did I even get it halfway properly applied. It took a while to dry as well, and this was just two coats. Hours later it was still VERY tacky to the point where it was impossible for me to cook dinner without destroying it. Alas, this only lasted for a few hours. I thought I had painted it in time for it to be dried before I had to begin dinner, but it just refused to dry. I'm sad, it kinda used to be a standby for me. I think the color is great for year-round but especially for the fall and winter or fancy occasions. I guess it's ok though, I have a similar frosty rosy pink color by Borghese, La Strada Rose, which I REALLY liked. I'll swatch that soon. Whenever my nails get a smidge longer. They are still fairly stubby.

Report card is as follows:
Color= B+ (it's a generic sort of color, but I like OPIs knack for delicate shimmer)
Formula= D (I'm holding out hope that it's just an old bottle, and if I can come across it again, I would be up for revisting this grade. I normally love OPI)
Brush=A- (better than average for sure, but not the best)
Price= D- (OPI is $$$, at least in my neck o' the woods)

Overall= C

Finger Paints- Putty in My Hands

"With one wave of you hand,
I'm your slave to command
But I'm glad it's okay
Oh anything you say, I'm like a hunk of clay..."
-"Putty (In Your Hands)" by The Shirelles

---




I bought this along with 2 other polishes at Sally Beauty this week, since they had a deal going where they were a buck off plus, if you bought 3, you got a little wallet thingie. I needed a new one, and I love excuses to buy polish, so voila. I bought Putty In My Hands, Art You Blue, and Fiji Weejee Fawn. I'm kinda confuzzled at Fiji Weejee Fawn, since it has nothing to do with fawn at all. It's a dark plummy mauve. I thought it was pretty, regardless of the silly name. But I'll cover that polish later, my nails had to be cut short since I had a booboo with my left middle finger. This is common, since I am a lefty and I hold my pens/pencils funny. I put a lot of pressure on that nail and it will break at least twice a month. So for now, I'm doing the lighter of my fall colors.

So, onto "Putty In My Hands". It's a pretty caramel color with a very delicate, ever-so-slight shimmer, though I still count it as a matte in my little world. Anyway, I put it on, and honestly, I immediately had trouble with it. It was thicker than I am used to, and I dislike the brush, I think it's either too long or too flimsy. It just slid around all willy nilly. It also dried too fast and since it was so thick, it was globby. I was sad. I loved the color. I took it off and decided to try a different color, but then afterwards, I googled around and other people liked Finger Paints, so I decided to give it another try. I took the thickness and quick-drying into account and did a better job of the application the second go-around and I am very glad I gave it another shot. The color is just great- a lovely neutral with a warm, caramelly-coffee-with-milk-and-sugar look. The faint shimmer is a nice touch, making this a very versatile polish. I can see this for all seasons, and it's neutral enough for casual and business but also shimmery enough to transition into classic fancy or night-time look.

So here's the report card:
Color= A- (Lovely color, probably flattering on most skin-tones, but also sort of commonplace at the same time)
Formula= C+ (Too thick for me to apply smoothly, but it did dry to a nice gloss and was very hardy, it lasted 2 days perfectly for me, and probably would've have went longer, but I wanted something different)
Brush=C (could definitely be better)
Price=C- (3.99 is what I paid, which isn't too bad, but it was a special, and normally 4.99, which is almost too rich for my blood.

Overall=C+

China Glaze- Classic Camel

"Gold! gold! gold! gold!
Bright and yellow, hard and cold!
~Thomas Hood"

(Here's my swatch. I know I have cuticles and such and it isn't perfect, but it's the best I can do, and as far as the cuticles go, I just learned about those in Anatomy and Physiology, and they are more important than you think, so I let mine do their thing.)



I was very intrigued with this color, which I found in the clearance bin at Sally Beauty, which only just recently opened up in my town. We otherwise have few options for polish, without traveling 45 minutes to over an hour.

What first struck me about this color is that it looked matte, even in the bottle, which I found peculiar. I also noticed it has very fine glitter, which, if my eyes are correct, contains some silver and even a few faintly-lavender flecks. I knew I had no other color like it, and it was 1.99 I believe, so how could I say no? Even if it was a bust, I figured I could play around with it if I ever got a stamp kit or the guts to try marbling.

Anyway, it's basically a golden-mustardy-honey tone with very faint amounts of glitter. I would call it simply "matte" so whether it's a creme or a jelly or a gravy, I can't tell you. But its finish was very matte on my nails with no frosty/metallic sheen, and no chromatic effect. That's basically the 3 types of nail polish in my lexicon- matte, metallic, and chromatic.

The formula is nice. It went on smoothly and easily. The brush was good, maybe even better than average, for application ease, and the smell wasn't abnormally vaporous. I was impressed with the drying time, although a little annoyed at the initial translucence. I am not one to put on more than 2 coats (and that includes top and/or basecoats!), so I hoped it would work with just two. I still did have a faintly detectable nail line after the second coat, but only in certain angles and light sources, so I was not concerned.

I wore it three days, including school with hard wear-and-tear from schoolish activities. By the end of the third day, it was still perfect with no tip-wear. I received several compliments on it, and I personally felt like it was flattering. There were a few times in certain lights that I thought it had a greenish tone that wasn't flattering, and I'm not sure it will be flattering on all skin-tones, but for me, overall, I really loved it. I do feel like it's more a fall color, or a color for a "fancy" occasion, so it probably isn't something I will wear year-round. However, it will most definitely be getting heavy wear this fall and winter!

So the report card overall is:

Color=A* (*with my skin-tone, but it probably isn't for everyone)
Formula= A+ (I wish all polish was with a similar formula)
Brush= B (I've had better, but I'd say it's average)
Price= C- (I'm going to take into account its full price, not what I paid for clearance. Full price is 4.99 and for me, that's a bit rich for nail polish. But, I've seen worse, and I'd gladly pay it for a color I love)

Overall=B